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Friday, July 04, 2003
comfort zones
so i finally tried indian food yesterday at kama, on king street. the most interesting moment of the whole dinner was not when i deciphered what the sets of saffron coloured statues were actually doing, but it was looking down at one of the metal trays and actually being a bit scared to try the food. i can't remember ever being scared to try food before, i only have love for food (except for evil natto), and here i was, in the middle of a restaurant, one that i had gone to willingly, hesitating. it made me wonder what other areas of my life have i become so deeply ensconced in comfort that i can't see beyond their padded walls?? too extreme of a metaphor? i don't think so... after all, isn't it crazy to live only for comfort? to not venture out of comfort zones? is this a realization that is to be translated into current situations? gah.
btw, the molten lava coloured entree which i hesitated in front of turned out to be one of my faves.
**************************
i just finished reading the JET daily digest for today, and one of the girls revealed the true nature of japan's clothing sizes, in real terms. according to her, if you're not a size 2, w/out breasts and a bum, then you'll have trouble finding clothes. even though reading that was pretty depressing, it was kind of a relief as well. finally, someone had concretely revealed the truth as it were about women's clothing to me, and none of that "oh you'll find stuff there" crap that I can get from my mom. my self-esteem has never really been this unstable before, as i consider myself in Japan, the land of the small and cute. here, i'm average, there, i'll be above-average and i think i'll become extra suspicious/sensitive of my size there. well, actually, without a doubt. which sucks i know, that i feel like i have to conform to the asian standard, especially when i have such a good, invigorating, i-feel-strong-and-healthy days like today (i ran TWICE!! voluntarily!). God, please help me get over this. I know I am wonderfully and fearfully made, but I forget that whenever I imagine scenarios where I feel completely alien. geez, i should just strap on a bunch of violinists to my back so they can come with me wherever i go. sigh.
hey, this'll be like stepping out of my clothing comfort zone?
****************************
music i need to get/"make" for japan:
-worship cd from susan
-nichole nordemann
-john mayer, inside wants out
-michelle branch hotel paper
-raphael siddiq, solo cd
-rick astley songs
-coldplay's first album
-cranberries' albums
-make mix cds
loooooooooooorrrrrrrrrd it's hot in here. note to self: it's good training, it's good training....
so i finally tried indian food yesterday at kama, on king street. the most interesting moment of the whole dinner was not when i deciphered what the sets of saffron coloured statues were actually doing, but it was looking down at one of the metal trays and actually being a bit scared to try the food. i can't remember ever being scared to try food before, i only have love for food (except for evil natto), and here i was, in the middle of a restaurant, one that i had gone to willingly, hesitating. it made me wonder what other areas of my life have i become so deeply ensconced in comfort that i can't see beyond their padded walls?? too extreme of a metaphor? i don't think so... after all, isn't it crazy to live only for comfort? to not venture out of comfort zones? is this a realization that is to be translated into current situations? gah.
btw, the molten lava coloured entree which i hesitated in front of turned out to be one of my faves.
**************************
i just finished reading the JET daily digest for today, and one of the girls revealed the true nature of japan's clothing sizes, in real terms. according to her, if you're not a size 2, w/out breasts and a bum, then you'll have trouble finding clothes. even though reading that was pretty depressing, it was kind of a relief as well. finally, someone had concretely revealed the truth as it were about women's clothing to me, and none of that "oh you'll find stuff there" crap that I can get from my mom. my self-esteem has never really been this unstable before, as i consider myself in Japan, the land of the small and cute. here, i'm average, there, i'll be above-average and i think i'll become extra suspicious/sensitive of my size there. well, actually, without a doubt. which sucks i know, that i feel like i have to conform to the asian standard, especially when i have such a good, invigorating, i-feel-strong-and-healthy days like today (i ran TWICE!! voluntarily!). God, please help me get over this. I know I am wonderfully and fearfully made, but I forget that whenever I imagine scenarios where I feel completely alien. geez, i should just strap on a bunch of violinists to my back so they can come with me wherever i go. sigh.
hey, this'll be like stepping out of my clothing comfort zone?
****************************
music i need to get/"make" for japan:
-worship cd from susan
-nichole nordemann
-john mayer, inside wants out
-michelle branch hotel paper
-raphael siddiq, solo cd
-rick astley songs
-coldplay's first album
-cranberries' albums
-make mix cds
loooooooooooorrrrrrrrrd it's hot in here. note to self: it's good training, it's good training....
// posted by naomi @ 12:00 a.m. 
